An Admission

I may have overdone it yesterday. Maybe. I’m convinced that one of the reasons thing a have been relatively easy for me this pregnancy has been my activity level. And I’ve worked hard to keep moving. But, as hard as this is for me to admit, with 3.5 weeks to go, I have to start shutting some things down. Or at least, choose my ski partners differently…

I was asked to do a Nordic lesson with Disabled Sports yesterday morning. Assuming it would be a pretty typical classic lesson, I agreed. Well, it was not. The kid was 14, which I knew, but he wanted to skate. I’m not a skate skier (yet- that’s next winter’s plan). But my co-instructor was, so that was fine. Except then I had to do my best to keep up with my 17 year old co-instructor and a 14 year old kid, both skating, on my classic gear. While 36.5 weeks pregnant. Holy hip pain, batman! Good lord! But I held my own and skied hard for an hour and a half. Why, you ask? I have NO earthly idea!

What is it about us that makes us so reluctant to admit that we need to slow down, take it easy, relax? If I was an Olympic athlete, it’d be simple. Clearly that competitiveness would be getting me somewhere, you know, like Sochi. But as it stands, I’m just really fricking stubborn and competitive for no reason. I have no outlet for that competitiveness, so I’m just competing against my own brain and body. Not great when you’re carrying a not so tiny human in your belly.

I knew I was hosed on the downhill. We were on our way back to the yurt and conditions were icy with a fair amount of obstacles (thanks to our current drought). So I tried to speed check with a half wedge so I didn’t lose it and yard sale. Also not a great idea this far along in the pregnancy. You don’t want to fall. Well, all that speed checking was not great for the hips. And apparently my back is out of whack. I don’t know, but I’m sore. I should have admitted that I was biting off more than I should be chewing right now. But that is really hard for me. And I’ll be fine. I’ll recover.

But still, I was so sore, I skipped out on going to the grocery store, walking the dogs, and really any movement other than stretching for the rest of the afternoon. It was a great lesson, though… Not a huge consolation prize, but a little one.

So what did this teach me? Eh. That maybe I should take a pass on that stuff, for now. It’s hard enough to keep up with some of these skiers at 34 when I’m not pregnant. I should probably start saying no. Everyone is different, but I feel lucky to have made it this long without major pain issues. And I can probably still ski. I just need to slow it down for the next few weeks. Argh.

But it’s only a few weeks. Then I’ll be so busy taking care of the tiny human that I won’t have time to lament my temporarily wrecked body or lack of fitness other than brief walks. Because that will be short lived as well. Before I know it, we’ll be out and about, walking dogs, maybe skiing, maybe eventually a little jogging… And best of all, we’ll have a little person! So I’m working on getting into that mind set. The one where I don’t get weird and panic about being in a hurry to lose baby weight, where I don’t get sad when stuff doesn’t just spring right back into place (why people have babies in their 20s…), and where I just go with the flow and try not to get bummed about friends Facebook posts where they’re successfully training for big races or crushing it in the backcountry. That will come again some day later. This is now. I’ll get back there (albeit in an assuredly different way… My jogs may start to include things like stops to check on the niño, and I may not be as quick to get out the door). This will likely be a little challenging for me, but I’m mentally preparing for it. I’ve got a solid post delivery support team, and I’m staying optimistic. We’ll just have to see how things shake out. And I’m also sure there will be lots of sleeping and feeding and changing diapers to distract me. The sleeping part is just wishful thinking, really. So I say bring it. We’re as ready as we’re going to be. Well, once we get some diapers. 🙂